Monday, May 3, 2010

Featured Writing by Yoni

Spring

by Yoni

Outside, spring reveals itself. The ground is moist and green from the earlier rain, while clouds still swirl and hover like menacing birds. Trees have begun to sprout their leaves and blossoms. The bark is rough against my back as I lean against the tree to rest.

I close my eyes and hear the sounds of spring: the sizzle of hot dogs and burgers on a grill, the trickle of water from a stream - and finally, the peaceful chirping of birds in the distance.

7 comments:

  1. I like the way you describe everything and not just list what you hear and see.

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  2. I like how you explained the weather. I really get the picture in my mind.

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  3. I like how you give details and how you used vocabulary.

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  4. Yoni, I like how you explain the weather.I really felt like i was there.

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  5. Yoni, I really like the sensory details of this piece, and your word choice is very specific. Some words that stand out for me are swirl, sizzle, and trickle. Nice!

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  6. Thank you for all your wonderful comments!

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  7. Yoni, you use really rich language. You definitely got your point across.

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